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Zero wasn`t born so much as found passed out in an alley after a long night of drinking and chopping wood. It was soon discovered that there is absolutely nothing he wouldn`t fap to. He also likes to pee on stuff for great justice.

It has been said there is no lengths that he won`t go to for lulz. He once raped the Lincoln Memorial with a two-day old Whopper and used Slurpee straw while screaming 'The south shall rise again!' and waving a Mexican flag at shocked bystanders. He supports equal rights for women in the kitchen, bombing countries who speak languages he doesn`t understand, and Tabasco sauce on bacon sammiches. Rumor has it that every morning he wakes up and takes a shit however, those rumors are unconfirmed.

Zero has been known to correctly predict the outcome of Super Bowls even when he is choosing the underdog. This is because of his telekewhatsis powers. He is also in possession of one stolen e-meter with Tom Cruise`s name embroidered on the side. When asked why he did it, he responded 'I?m Mexican. I steal stuff.' The mind control tool now smells suspiciously like pee.

To sum it all up, zero is a rotten jerk who you should never, ever agree with. If you find yourself being swayed by any of his arguments, stab your eyes out with a lemon.



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